How to distinguish terminal illness

- Regarding your wife's blood test, due to an administrative mistake, I cannot be sure which blood sample belongs to your wife. According to the two samples, she either has AIDS or has had a severe heart attack.
- So what should I do? - asked the husband.
- Oh, I suggest you let her run about 10 kilometers. If she comes back alive, don't sleep with her again.

Find the right person

A guy who just broke up with his girlfriend sat down and talked to his friend.
- She did everything to change me. She taught me to wake up early to jog, not to smoke. She also taught me how to dress nicely, to appreciate art, to spend money…
The friend interrupted:
- You can't stand it so you break up?
- No! After I changed, I improved a lot and she no longer meets my standards, so I have to find someone else.