Annoying text messages from office workers

"Hey" is the opening phrase that Harrison Luongtran, 42, creative director at advertising company Lucky Generals in the US, often uses with employees.

Atheina Hasbani, Harrison's employee, started thinking "Am I about to get fired?", "What did I do wrong?" or "What's going on with her family?" every time she got a text. The 31-year-old imagined the worst-case scenario every time she got a text that started with "hey." But the person wouldn't text her again if she didn't respond.

This phenomenon is called the "hey-and-wait" style, through the way of texting with the words "Hey", "hello", "hi". This opening line seems harmless but makes the recipient feel insecure and anxious. Psychologists say this type of texting can trigger the human fight or flight response.

Bryan Robinson, a psychotherapist and author of the book on collaborative work, says that to survive the brain needs to know "what's going to happen" and often tends to anticipate the worst-case scenario.

But the “hey” messages Harrison sends to colleagues are simply opening lines for work-related discussions, like asking for access to a presentation or asking when the CEO will be in the office. In the modern workplace, quick responses to get things done are highly valued, according to the manager, which encourages real-time online conversations.

“There are a lot of rules about how to start a conversation,” says creative director Harrison, who also thinks her colleague is too young, has low stamina, and is prone to thinking out of the box.

A Harris Poll survey of 1,200 employees and executives in 2023 found that nearly 90% of the workweek is spent communicating across different platforms. The report, conducted by grammar-checking software company Grammarly, also revealed that many people experience misunderstandings in communication.

Fiana Tulip, a branding expert and marketing consultant in New York, is familiar with Robyn Jackson Malone, CEO of a public relations firm in Chicago. The two have worked together on projects a few times, and Malone sometimes texts Tulip “hey” without adding any information.

“It drives me crazy,” Tulip said, adding that she only responds to messages if she has more information.

But from Malone's perspective, she thinks it would be rude to text a bunch of wishes without waiting for the other person to respond.

Corporate communications consultants say part of the problem is that workplace instant messaging platforms are relatively new.

According to Microsoft, today's most active users typically send and receive around 150 messages a day, which is equivalent to more than 250 emails. Information from the Slack app indicates that up to 700 million messages are sent every day on the platform.

Discord, a platform that started as a gaming community, is being used by many office workers for chatting.

Compared to emails, which are often lengthy and don’t require immediate responses, instant messages are interactive and real-time. While emails have unwritten rules like avoiding all caps, using unusual fonts, or replying to all, there are fewer clear rules for texting in the workplace.

Kate Buchanan, who manages innovation initiatives related to human resources at the software company Autodesk (USA), still sends "hi" or "hey" to colleagues. But then she gets distracted or feels the need to chat anymore, so she goes silent.

“So when someone texts ‘hi,’ how should you respond?” Madison Kanna, a senior software engineer at Walmart’s healthcare division, asked after receiving several similar messages.

Some people advised Kanna not to reply. Others said not to care and suggested he become a member of the website nohello.net with the message: Stop just texting "hello" when chatting.

Constance Hadley, professor of management and organizations at Boston University's Questrom School of Business, advises workers to express their discomfort to their partner.

“Your ‘hey’ text is distracting. This may be a favorite, short way to start, but not everyone feels comfortable,” the professor suggests.