Stress when helping children write

Linh's handwriting in the early days of learning to write online. Photo: Character provided

Since her child started first grade online, Ms. Linh, 33 years old, residing in Long Bien district, Hanoi, has been stressed every day. Tutoring her child in writing in the morning and afternoon, sitting next to her child to support her child in online learning in the evening, she has scolded and even slapped her child many times.

"His handwriting is messy and he often loses concentration, so I have to closely monitor him to keep up with the progress. However, the more I do it, the more he complains and throws tantrums because he has to write in the morning and at night while the neighbors go out to play. My head feels like it's going to explode, and sometimes I can't control my emotions," Linh said.

Since last year, when hearing rumors of a new curriculum being more difficult, Ms. Linh sent her son to a pre-primary course following the advice of many parents. As a result, her son was able to recognize letters and numbers and write with the correct strokes.

However, after nearly 5 months of not being exposed to writing regularly, the child seemed to start over, especially when having to study online, the teacher could not "hold her hand and shape her writing". Looking back at the pages of notebooks where the letter "o" was written like the letter "o", with round strokes becoming crooked, straight strokes becoming curved, and letters of different sizes, Ms. Linh was both annoyed and amused.

At that time, she did not have to go to work because the city was in social distancing, so Ms. Linh had time to stay home and tutor her son. Although she sometimes felt helpless because she could not explain to her son the width, the beginning and end of a letter, after more than a month of practicing with her son, his handwriting became much more beautiful.

However, Ms. Linh is still "helpless" when it comes to her child's lack of concentration when writing. "When he concentrates, his handwriting is beautiful, but after only half a line, he wants to put down the pen. Up to now, it still takes him a whole morning to finish two pages of his notebook, and if I go to work without someone to closely supervise him, it takes him a whole day to finish," Ms. Linh said.

Like Ms. Linh, Ms. Ha, 31 years old, Nam Tu Liem district, also sweats every time she remembers the beginning of the school year. When her first grade daughter first started studying online, she seemed excited because studying through a computer screen was a new experience.

However, after about a week, when the teacher started teaching her to write, her child could not keep up with the speed, and the strokes were also off the grid. For three consecutive weeks, the mother received daily private messages from the teacher with the content "asking parents to help more". Ms. Ha and her husband decided to start a "campaign" to teach their child to write.

Asking her friends, she found some soft, clear pencils. Sitting next to her daughter, she saw her struggling with the letters, writing slowly and often making mistakes. She asked her daughter to look carefully at each letter before writing, to see where it started and ended, and to write it over and over again. With difficult letters, she marked them first according to the shape so that her child could trace them to avoid mistakes.

To avoid "losing her appetite", calligraphy practice usually starts at 8pm. Knowing that she has a hot temper, Ms. Ha tells her husband to "change shifts" every 30 minutes.

After about three weeks, Ms. Ha's child received praise for "progress" from the teacher. The mother was as happy as if she were being rewarded. "Thank goodness, the handwriting is not very beautiful, but it has become faster," she breathed a sigh of relief.

Currently, Ms. Ha's daughter has started to write in small letters with a needle pen. The mother said that practicing writing for first graders when learning online is "extremely difficult" because the teacher does not hold her hand to guide her. Even though the teacher has shown how many squares high and wide the letter is, the child still has difficulty imagining it.

On forums, parents share videos of writing instruction and take pictures of their children’s notebooks to comment and edit together. Some students have written well and have switched to writing with light and bold strokes, while others still scribble like in the early days.

Ms. Hoang Quynh Anh, a first-grade teacher at Khuong Thuong Primary School (Dong Da District), also found that online learning slows down children's writing practice. "Even in ideal conditions with good equipment and parental supervision, students' writing practice is only about 70-80% of that of face-to-face learning," Ms. Quynh Anh shared.

The reason she gave was that when studying in person, teachers have many ways to help students write correctly, such as holding their hands and standing right next to them to guide them. However, with online learning, even guiding students to count boxes and where to put their pen on each line "is difficult". Not to mention, many students go back to their hometowns with their grandparents or stay at home with a maid, and are affected by the local accent or speak with a lisp like their relatives. Because of their lisp, they also write incorrectly.

Despite finding many ways to support, such as sending instructional videos, investing in object projectors, and electronic drawing boards so that students can see more clearly, Ms. Quynh Anh admitted that without parents accompanying them, it is very difficult for students to write correctly and maintain speed.

Assessing that this year's first graders are very disadvantaged and have a hard time because they have just missed half a year of kindergarten and have to study online from the beginning of first grade, the teacher with 10 years of experience hopes that parents will be more patient with their children and closely monitor them so that they can get into a routine.

Ms. Linh and Ms. Ha also admitted that they probably had too high expectations for their children, so they felt pressured and stressed when their children were often complained about their bad handwriting. "Actually, I myself cannot remember all the names of the strokes. It is difficult for my child to write correctly according to the square size, and his hands and feet are also clumsy and awkward, so if he is not guided, it will be difficult to write correctly. Parents need to patiently guide and write more samples," Ms. Ha said.

On the morning of November 11, reporting at the National Assembly's question-and-answer session, Minister of Education and Training Nguyen Kim Son said that nearly 20 million students nationwide have not been able to go to school for a very long time due to the epidemic. In that context, online learning is the inevitable solution to avoid disrupting learning.

Assessing the effectiveness, the minister said that online learning "cannot be as good as face-to-face learning". Therefore, he suggested "not to be too stressed", not to immediately survey and evaluate the quality of teaching and learning, but to take time to review and consolidate knowledge.

Ms. Ha agrees with this view and said that she is also learning to reduce her expectations for her child when she realizes that online learning may continue for a while longer.

According to VnExpress