Behind the young people running away from home

Unworthy reasons

Rushing home to welcome guests, Mr. TVC in Mau Duyet village, Cam Hung commune (Cam Giang) was still wearing his sweaty work shirt. He is the father of TNA (born in 2009), a 9th grade student who ran away from home on February 18 and was found by the police 5 days later in Hanoi.

He said that his child is now mentally stable and is focusing on studying and preparing for the upcoming important 10th grade entrance exam. Previously, A. was a good boy, had good grades, and had never said anything rude to his grandparents or parents. After studying online due to the Covid-19 pandemic, A. met some friends on social media. "These people lured and enticed me to leave home and go to Hanoi to work. When the family found me, A. was serving at a milk tea shop there," said Mr. C. A. admitted that the decision to leave home was a moment of impulsive thinking.

We went to Ms. TTY's house in Dao Xa village, An Binh commune (Nam Sach) but the door was locked. Ms. Nguyen Thi Hien, Party cell secretary and head of Dao Xa village, said that the incident at Ms. Y's house happened more than a year ago but everyone in the village still remembers it. TTH (Ms. Y's daughter, born in 2005), left home in mid-March 2023. The reason was that H.'s studies were declining and she fell in love early, so her father often scolded her. "Her negative thoughts made her act foolishly," said Ms. Hien.

After 10 days of searching without finding her, Ms. Y's family reported to the An Binh Commune Police. On March 31, the An Binh Commune Police found H. in Song Cong City (Thai Nguyen).

There are currently no specific statistics on the situation of children running away from home in Hai Duong. However, the consequences it causes are very concerning. There are children who have left and never returned. That is LTTA (born in 2007), in Quan Loc village, Tien Dong commune (Tu Ky). A. left home on the evening of July 17, 2023, then jumped off Xe bridge to commit suicide. Her body was discovered by locals the following evening right at the sluice gate leading water from Thai Binh river to the worm bed of a family in Binh Han village, Cong Lac commune (also Tu Ky district).

Running away from home can also lead to many other serious consequences such as the risk of being abused, abused, kidnapped, etc. Children can fall into social evils such as drugs, prostitution, etc., causing chaos for the family and confusion and instability for society.

Love children the right way

Many people believe that children today have the opportunity to be exposed to harmful culture, so they are easily spoiled, and just a small incident can make them run away from home. However, it is necessary to look at the opposite, modern life with many pressures also makes adults not spend enough time and care for children, leading to unfortunate events. The case of LTD (born in 2009) in Hiep Cat commune (Nam Sach) is an example.

Two years ago, D. ran away from home and was found by his family shortly after. After the incident, his grandparents discovered that D. had lost weight and was eating poorly. Taking him to the hospital, the doctor discovered that D. had hyperthyroidism, one of the reasons why he was often nervous and anxious. “Perhaps because of his illness, he was often nervous and anxious, but just a few light scoldings from his family made him think and run away from home. If he had known that he was sick, the family would have had other methods to avoid such unfortunate incidents,” said Mr. LXH - D.’s grandfather.

In fact, some parents think that it is enough to give their children a comfortable material life. Parents are indifferent, making their children lonely in their own home. Meanwhile, children have many needs to explore, play… and need to be listened to and understood.

Studies show that running away from home often occurs during puberty, from 10 to 18 years old. Mr. Nguyen Thanh Du, a civics teacher at Nam Sach High School, said that this is the age when young people have strong psychological and physiological changes, also known as the rebellious period. Children do not understand themselves, do not know how to express themselves, so it is even more difficult to share so that others can understand. From there, they easily fall into a deadlocked state. Especially when forced or ordered, children often do the opposite, are indifferent, and resist... in the hope of freeing themselves.

According to Mr. Du, in some cases, because parents and teachers do not really trust them, children leave to prove their maturity and independence. In other cases, children want to escape parental divorce, violence, abuse, gender discrimination, and crises at school...

This reality shows that children need more attention and sharing from their parents. Even though they are busy, parents should still arrange time with their children, turn that moment into a “golden hour”, build a close relationship with their children, so that their children are always educated and oriented in the best way. If possible, parents should also let their children participate in life skills courses so that they can become more mature in their thinking.

For children who run away from home, when they return, parents should not criticize, but should encourage and talk sincerely with their children, helping them understand that such actions should not be done and are very dangerous.

“Parents and teachers need to proactively coordinate in understanding the psychological developments of children both at home and at school. From there, appropriate measures can be taken to help children trust and proactively share their feelings and thoughts so that parents and teachers can guide them properly,” said Mr. Du.