Peer pressure in youth

When "other people's children" also fail

Since childhood, Mac Phuong Dong (17 years old) in Hai Duong city has had high expectations and invested heavily in his studies by his parents. He himself has always strived and made efforts with the highest determination, studying at a key school and his achievements have always been in the top of his class and school. Therefore, in 9th grade, when Dong was an excellent student in the chemistry team but did not win any prizes in the provincial competition for excellent students, he fell into crisis and depression. At that time, it was his literature teacher who encouraged, shared, and helped him out of the quagmire of failure. He realized that there was nothing to worry about, when one door closes, another will open. Therefore, he strived to pass the entrance exam to Nguyen Trai High School for the Gifted and became the class monitor of the Chemistry class.

Once considered a good child and good student, after 4 years of university, Ms. Pham Thi Ngoc Diep (27 years old) in Nam Sach had an unfavorable start to her career, having to work in a different field for 3 years. The psychological pressure from peers also appeared from here. Seeing her friends having stable jobs, working in the right field with high incomes, buying houses, buying cars... made her feel insecure and doubtful about herself. At the same time, she also felt pressured about her family when she was nearly 30 years old and still single, while her friends had settled down, constantly showing off their wedding photos and children's photos on social media.

Peer pressure psychology comes from the impact and influence of people of the same age or the same social group who are considered more successful and happier for an individual, causing feelings of inferiority, insecurity, and anxiety.

Peer pressure exists in all eras, but it is most evident and has the strongest influence on today's young generation. The reason is that young people live in the digital age, all information is shared on social networks such as Facebook, Zalo, Instagram, TikTok... so it is easy to know each other's information. However, they also create unrealistic standards of appearance, success and lifestyle. Young people often feel the need to express themselves in the way others expect, leading to great pressure.

In addition, competition in the school environment, expectations of children's academic achievements and careers from parents also put pressure on young people. When these expectations are not met, young people feel like failures.

Leads to depression, anxiety

The age at which peer pressure is most evident falls on Gen Z because this is the age when they have to start an independent life, do not have much life experience and are influenced by many things around them. In addition, this age group is also eager to succeed in both study and work. People with the above psychological conditions often show signs of stress, fatigue, often feel anxious, restless for no apparent reason, think too much, disrupt sleep, often compare themselves with others or worse, suffer from prolonged stress.

In addition, peer pressure can lead to anxiety and depression, and can strain relationships between young people. They may become jealous, envious of, or even alienate friends who are more successful than they are. In some cases, peer pressure can lead young people to engage in self-destructive behavior.

When forced to live up to societal standards, young people can lose their ability to be creative and explore themselves. They become passive and reluctant to experiment, which affects their personal development. Despite living in a connected world, peer pressure can make young people feel lonely and afraid to share their true feelings with others for fear of being judged.

To overcome peer pressure, each young person finds a different way. At a specialized school, Phuong Dong faced pressure from other class leaders when she saw many achievements from other class leaders. To find a solution to reassure herself, every week, Dong asked her classmates if she was okay being class leader, how they felt about her. The purpose was to find a safe answer from her friends, to make up for her mental fear and to be a method to heal her soul.

As for Ms. Ngoc Diep, to avoid being pressured, she has planned her future direction, self-assessed her own abilities to find a suitable job. Up to now, she has a stable job, in the right field at a law office with a stable income, knows how to balance her thinking, understands what she does and what she wants. "Everyone has their own direction, so I have stopped comparing myself with anyone, I am unique and focus on pursuing my personal goals," Ms. Diep said.

Schools should also focus on psychological education, helping students become more aware of peer pressure and how to cope by organizing workshops and talks on psychology. Families and society also need to create conditions for young people to develop self-confidence. Encouraging individuals to explore their strengths and accept their shortcomings will help them feel more comfortable in expressing themselves. At the same time, creating safe spaces for young people to share their feelings and experiences, group activities, clubs, creating opportunities to connect and support each other.

Peer pressure is a complex issue that young people are facing. It is important to create a positive environment where each individual can freely express themselves without fear of being judged. Only then can young people develop fully and happily.